Notebook - stop making new year's resolutions

Ah, January 2020! We have a New Year. A new decade. New you. New Start. That’s what it’s all about, right? Wrong!! Here at We Are Tabono, it’s a definite no to New Year’s Resolutions!

In my experience, New Years’ Resolutions only serve to continue the build of negative emotions that we feel about ourselves when we set the bar too high. We feel that we have failed to reach the targets we set ourselves.

This negative pattern just keeps repeating itself.

Then once we feel that sense of ‘failure’, the most likely outcome is feeling down, beating ourselves up, and often sabotaging our efforts with more of the unhelpful behaviours we originally set out to remove!

It doesn’t matter if we are talking about improving our nutrition, moving our bodies more, getting more organised, actually making those sales calls, or just generally being more productive. Regardless of whether they are business or wellbeing related, these kinds of sweeping New Year’s Resolutions are often doomed from the start.

Progress, not perfection. 

How much better would it feel to if we focussed on progress, not perfection? Instead, seeing the benefits of small changes made over time?

Whilst we may well ultimately want to do any of those things listed above, we have to recognise that they are big goals. And as such they represent a need to go from 0 to 60 overnight, which is more often than not, highly unrealistic.

I appreciate that at the beginning of a new year, many of us feel the urge to change things. We identify the need to focus on areas of our lives like health, wellbeing, career, and home life. That’s great, and to be applauded. However, all too often we set unrealistic goals. We decide we must change everything all at once, and in doing so, we create pressure. Then, when we can’t deliver on that promise, we feel terrible and beat ourselves up.

Not just about New Year.

It’s great to start the process of making positive change at any time, not just New Year, because of course, the time will pass anyway. In a year from now, whateverbe the day and date you’re reading this, you will wish you had started on those goals today.

This is where solid, well thought out, goal setting comes into play. Look at those grand, sweeping resolutions, across the different areas of your life, and start to break them down.

So, if not New Year’s Resolutions…

Follow these guidelines to help you make progress, both as you move into the new decade, and at any other point in the year:

What are your intentions for the coming year?

What things in the different areas of your life would you like to make some progress with?

Choose a word for your year.

Think about how you want 2020 to look / feel / be, and start jotting down words that resonate with you. Once you choose a word, keep it visible in as many places as possible. As you move through the coming months, do the actions you take and decisions you make, align with this word and take you closer towards it?

Think of those intentions or goals as little projects.

Each project will have many elements to it. Write down all the elements, all the tasks, all the little to do’s that may be associated with making that goal happen and then order them in terms of importance / priority.

Decide to set yourself a goal or aim each month.

Keep the balance by focusing on something for your business and something for your wellbeing. Take one of those little elements that are part of the bigger goal, and commit to getting it done. Each little commitment takes you a step closer to those bigger intentions.

When you put all of this together and use it throughout the year, it just might mean that come December, as you start to reflect back on 2020, you will have achieved a whole lot more progress that you thought possible.

And always remember, celebrating each little success along the way is of huge importance and significance in your journey and your self confidence. So as we move towards the coming year, ditch the New Year’s Resolutions, and start focussing on making progress!