Anna Verghese and Chloe Leibowitz

Why it’s important to surround yourself with people who give you confidence? The people we surround ourselves with are so important. They can change everything. For better or worse. 

Confidence is something many of us find to be a challenge. Thinking we don’t have enough. Feeling like an imposter. Worrying if we’re good enough. Being scared to put ourselves out there.

One way to help reserve, and actually build, your confidence , is to ensure those people around you are positive, and are your cheerleaders. Ultimately they bring you more confidence and reinforce your self-belief.

Beware the energy vampires

It’s all too easy to find ourselves spending time with energy vampires and those who make us question ourselves. When you’re running a business, you need to stay as positive and forward focused as possible. So it’s time to work out who your cheerleaders are, find the people who give you confidence, and identify whether you there are some people around who just drag you down.

So ask yourself – how do your friends react when you talk to them about your business plans?

Now, we’re not saying everyone has to agree with you all the time. Not at all. We know it’s valuable to have some constructive criticism. Someone who’s slightly outside the situation and can see things more objectively than we can. 

But. What about those friends or family who react with “oh, why would you do that? Isn’t it a bit risky, and what if you’re no good at it?” Do they fill you with confidence?

Nope. 

Different strokes for different folks

In this situation, it’s good to know which of your team are great to share ideas and plans with, and which ones are better for support in other areas of your life. Maybe they’re great when it comes to celebrating successes, but perhaps you should keep new ideas and plans away from them, so they don’t erode your sense of confidence and put you off.

It’s also a good idea to work out if there are any truly toxic people around you shouldn’t really be spending time with at all. We know it can sometimes be difficult with families, and that there may always be people you have to spend some time with even if it’s not all positive. However, if you have friends who really do just bring you down, isn’t it time you thought about whether you should be spending time with them at all? 

Positive people

Positive people will generally help you to get places faster. Not because they do things for you, but because they are confident in your abilities, even when you’re not. They can see the greatness inside you, and will want you to succeed. 

That’s why those positive, determined, motivated people are the ones to have by your side. As your sounding board. To ask for help if things get tricky. And indeed, to turn to if you have a crisis of confidence. They will happily remind you why it is they think you’re so great – and who doesn’t need to hear that?

It’s important to remember that often, the people who are a more negative voice in our lives, are that way because of their own issues. They probably don’t really think you can’t do things, but if you did do those things, rather than feeling excited for you, it would make them feel more down on themselves. Their confidence is quite possibly low, or just threatened, and so it’s not possible for them to be cheerleader for you.

So pick wisely. Make sure the people around you have your best interests at heart. Make sure there is a mutual desire to lift each other up. To build each other’s confidence and continue to celebrate each others successes. 

It’s a winning formula, and can do wonders for your confidence and self belief. 

If confidence is something you struggle with, we’re here to help! If you’re not quite ready to talk, our Confidence short course might be exactly what you’re looking for. Or if you need a listening ear, check out our Personal Coaching page. You’re also welcome to make our community your cheerleading team!

But also let us know who the people are that give you confidence in the comments – we’d love to hear!